Loss Plus Loss Equals Lost
Why do we sometimes lose something as a response to losing something? It seems insane, and it is. Example: someone loses a loved one to death, and the survivor responds by getting drunk or drugged. Not only has the person lost a loved one. They have now lost sobriety. I had found this to be an escape from pain, until it was pointed out to me that loss as a response to loss is not very effective as a solution to anything.
You never get back the first loss by a second loss. Someone loses a relationship. Response? A geographic. They move. Now they have lost roots, friends, community, and the relationship is still over. You lose an argument, a bet, your keys, your wallet, purse. Response? You lose your temper. You get all angry, but this does not find any lost item. Co-ed goes to frat party. Loses sobriety. Response? Loses self-respect. Hangovers never go away by waking up with strangers. Finally, I lose time by losing myself in fantasy.